Monday, April 09, 2007

Would You Like a Coffee?


Now we all know that Grandad is very fond of drinking coffee. He is forever telling us about his trips down to the village to have some. Maybe Granny refuses to serve it at home……






An Irish woman of advanced age visited her G.P. to ask his help in reviving her husband's libido.

"What about trying Viagra?" asks the doctor?

"Not a chance," she said. "He won't even take an aspirin!"

"Not a problem," replied the doctor. "Give him an Irish Viagra. Drop it into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went."

It wasn't a week later that she called the doctor, who inquired as to
progress.

The poor woman exclaimed, "Oh, Saint Francis tonight! T'was terrible. Just terrible, doctor!"

"Really? What happened?" asked the doctor.

"Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the
effect was almost immediate. He jumped hisself straight up, with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely!

With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and tablecloth flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!"

“Why so terrible?" asked the doctor. "Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't good?"

"Oh, no, no, no, Doctor, the sex was fine indeed! T’was the best sex I've had in 25 years. But sure as I'm sittin' here, I'll never be able to show me face in the village coffee shop again!"

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

He beats me on the bottom with The Woman's Weekly.

That always gets me going

grannymar said...

Whatever turns you on! ;)

Brian Damage said...

A guy I knew called Jimmy The Boner had an interesting tale behind his nickname.

He was called Jimmy The Boner because one day, while in an art gallery on a field trip, looked at the pictures of naked women on the walls and it got his pants a-bulgin', as you said.

Three years on, he's still called Jimmy The Boner.

Anonymous said...

Hello Grannymar,

That woman you wrote about was suffering from what we call "SOCIAL SECURITY SEX". That is: you get a little each month but not enough to live on.

Anonymous said...

Grannymar,

Your story also reminded me of the old man who went to the doctor and said he wanted his sex drive lowered. The doctor said,"You're 95 years old, don't you think your sex drive is all in your head"?
"You're damned right it is",replied the old man,"That's why I want it lowered."

grannymar said...

Nancy its good to have you back.

"SOCIAL SECURITY SEX" thats a new one to me!